SELF DISCOVERY ... yet again.
Lessons I've learned this year.
On the last Sunday of this month, I wlll preach and begin serving at Sunrise Christian Church in Rogers City, Michigan. The past year has been one of the most challenging and yet rewarding seasons of my life and ministry. So, I thought I’d take a moment and share a very incomplete list of some of the lessons I have learned (or am still learning) — about me, about ministry, about life.
... the thoughts are unedited and in no particular order:
God is so wise and so kind.
• He has bigger and better plans than we realize - if we listen, let Him lead, trust, obey… and, keep breathing!
• His provision, strength, compassion, wisdom, laughter and patience has kept me safe & sane!
• His Word gets better & better every single day. His Son makes all of the goodness that comes from my life happen. His Spirit convicts me, reminds me and makes me FREE!
My wife loves me MORE than I deserve.
• Over the past 2 years she made ANOTHER big move with me, and is packing right now for another one! She’s my cheerleader, caregiver, best friend and true love. She makes EVERYONE better.
• We blew right through our 35th & 36st wedding anniversarys (due to ‘everything else’) and still haven’t properly celebrated. But, we will and until then, we find the little moments to express our love.
• She’s the most amazing friend you could ever have and, wow, she knows Jesus SO WELL!
My kids are PEOPLE not parts, pawns or projects.
• Each of them are wonderfully different, unique, gifted, talented, opinionated, sensitive, resilient and absolutely awesome! They don’t fit into normal stereotypes! I have learned, LOTS, from each of them.
• They are ALL adults now. Sigh… it happens much faster than you realize. We have enjoyed 33 straight years with at least one kid at home and are, just now, embarking on our next adventure without them — empty-nesterers. Gulp.
• My kids each have their own faith journey and express their beliefs differently from each other and us. I’m ok with this. There’s so much weird family stuff in ministry (nepotism, etc), and we are confident that God will be glorified through each of them.
Blood is thicker than water and Spirit is thicker than blood.
• Thankful for the family & friendships that God brings into our lives (and us into theirs). This is a work in progress ... and I still have lonely moments but I trust God. But my kids have had lots of “uncles & aunts” or “big brothers & sisters” that didn’t share their physical dna but certainly shared it spiritually. MAKE SENSE?
• My “spirit family” has been such a blessing to US during this year. LOVE all of you (who claim us)!
◦ btw: my blood family has also been INCREDIBLE this year! Thankful for all of the praying, believing, visiting, laughing and loving that they have given us! My dad and Sharon, have been so gracious and generous too — even after 62 years being “pastor” — he still leads the way! And, our brothers and their wives have been INCREDIBLE too!
I’m forgettable.
• Yes, I don’t think I’m on everyone’s radar like I once was (if I ever was).
• Most friendships I have are maintained by my pursuit... and, that’s ok, I get it.
◦ And, if I’m honest, I’ve probably blown this more than I realize it.
• People move on, life changes and often the very thing that facilitated some friendships (ministry, speaking, geography, youth, denomination, etc) change and we simply lose track...
◦ Makes you wonder what we really had?
• PLEASE no pity -- this is not a cry for help! I’m honestly content & harbor no ill feelings.
I will NEVER close the bridge of love.
“Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things” 1 Corinthians 13:7 — this is on artwork on our wall and tattooed on my forearm as well.
• No matter who you are or how we know each other, whether you hurt me, I hurt you OR some other misunderstanding, I still LOVE you and the bridge back into my life is always open. And, if I blew it, I’ll own it.
• I have NO problem apologizing or forgiving... life is too short, precious and wonderful to allow any offense to create monsters or ghosts!
• Find the bridge & I’ll meet you in the middle!
I don’t always DIE (to self) quick enough!
• I need to be crucified with Christ (Galatians 2:20) daily OR even more often.
• Sometimes when you’re a high-level leader, you forget this or only die in the areas you think are necessary or convenient. Get ready for the pain train!!
• Significance doesn’t come with NUMBERS (church size, house size, salary size or ego size). It comes through faithfulness, character, listening, smiling, loving and serving. Being a person of peace will bring you into arenas of influence that you never imagined.
I loved the South but I’m an up North kind of guy!
• I can endure and even enjoy the high temps, humidity, bugs, bad driving and accents in the south and Southern hospitality is a REAL THING. Sweet tea is legit. I loved having my own swimming pool and a 6 hour drive to beautiful beaches.
• But, my name is Chilly 🥶 — I love cool fall hoodie nights, real WHITE Christmases, doing donuts in snowy parking lots, snuggling by fire, snow men in the yard, skiing, gloves, boots and Carhartt beanies (for warmth not fashion)!
• Ok, ultimately I love wherever I live because God sent me there! He puts love in us for the places he leads us! He’s got great plans. And, His adventures are amazing in every kind of weather!
I can’t NOT make disciples.
• I am a disciple who makes disciples who make disciples...
• Whether I’m in a large group environment or ministry OR at a coffee shop with one person, IT’S ON!
• Discipleship is not something that fits into a 40 hour work week or ministry job description -- it’s fluid, natural, unstoppable for anyone who has been truly discipled.
• Nothing could stop Paul: not prison, not persecution, not haters, not shipwrecks, not sickness, not poverty, not neglect and not misunderstanding.
• Hang around him (or ME) and you’re going to hear about Jesus and be challenged to “recklessly abandon yourself to the call & purpose of God!”
My best days are AHEAD.
IF I have a pulse, I have a purpose! And, I’m going to get it!
I’m still discovering NEW things IN me!
• I’ve been called many times “a Swiss-Army knife” of ministry.
• Most who say this are referring to my life & experiences over the last 35 years. I can draw from many different scenarios with insight and encouragement.
• But, I also believe there are ‘blades’ or other ‘devices’ that have never been opened on this “knife” -- I get excited about being stretched again and learning something new that God has created me to become! Open me LORD!!
I was created for YOU.
• Part of the reason God made me is to encourage, mentor, coach, love and lead others. The fact that you’re reading this tells me we have some sort of connection.
• And I want YOU to know that God has earmarked you for greatness! You are His masterpiece! Your past does not define your future!
• Please stop allowing lies and excuses into your life to confuse you, discourage you or even, stop you. NO WAY! We’re in this together -- and, I’m not quitting, so you CAN’T either!
• Smile, laugh, rest, eat and enjoy life today -- then, dive into Jesus -- His word, His presence and His plans!
• Rediscover YOU and get after your destiny again!
• I’m cheering right now!!
Yep, I could go on writing and writing but I’ll pause now.
I’m not putting this whole thing on Facebook (maybe just the link).
But, IF this has touched your life OR IF I can love you or bless you better -- hit the comments below!
Love, Strength & Honor,
Chilly
